Top Ten Reasons To Go to Theatre

1. Your parole officer would never think to look there.

2. Your boyfriend is not allowed to talk to you while the show is running.

3. Your girlfriend is not allowed to talk to you while the show is running.

4. They still have intermissions (Thank God for that super big gulp soda.)

5. You sound sophisticated when you tell your friends.

6. The closest you’re ever likely to get to half-naked women without a tip rail.

7. It gives you something to talk about while you sip your double half-caff, skinny, skippy, ultra latte.

8. No one will accuse you of following the crowd.

9. You might have a touching experience that doesn’t require a restraining order.

10. No matter how many times you go, it’s bound to be a different show.

Thanks to Emily for this!