This was the series of text messages I sent this morning, after doing a radio interview in Lansing:

-Trapped in a parking structure in Lansing! The card reader can’t read the ticket and won’t let us out!

-Had to call the “call for help” number!! Hope help comes – we need food and water.

-Will my last days be in a parking structure, all because of a faulty ticket reader??

-It’s starting to look like LORD OF THE FLIES in here. Some people started a signal fire.

-The parking attendant showed up. The group on Deck 3 ATE HIM!!!

-Deck 2 just elected an Emperor, who declared war on Deck 3. People are sharpening ice-scrapers into spears.

-Deck 4 just started sacrifices to appease the Speed Bumps. I want to go home.

-Trying to sneak back to the outside world. Distracted the Stairwell Tribe with an air-freshener and 1/2 of an old Starbucks muffin.

-We made it!! Some missionaries helped smuggle us out a fire exit! From now on, I’m only parking at meters.